Beauty in the Ordinary

This is not about being brilliant, or extraordinary, it's not about wanting to be famous, or making headlines, or trying to impress...this about sharing a 'gift' each day with the lift the spirit of people when they read this blog, to show them the beauty in the ordinary.
"And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it." Raold Dahl

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Sideways Shift

Had a bit of a sideways shift last night,
something that knocked me slightly off-kilter.

I watched The Social Network.
(for the two of you out there who haven't heard of this movie,
it's about the origins of Facebook.)

I was so upset after watching it, I de-activated my
Facebook account.

Meister Eckhart says "People should not worry as much about what they do but rather about what they are.  If they and their ways are good, then their deeds are radiant.  If you are righteous, then what you do will be righteous.  We should not think that holiness is based on what we do but rather on what we are, for it is not our works which sanctify us but we who sanctify our works."

What disturbed me about the movie was how this medium has grown up out of
mean-spiritedness and people who believe treating others badly is okay (if the movie is to be believed).  
I think to support something 
like this, to support people like this, is bad for our world.

My kids think I am over-reacting, but at the end 
of the day, I only have my one voice and I think it
not only important to talk the talk...I believe you
have to walk the walk.

I really need to think on this for a while.  I'd appreciate your opinion.


  1. Gosh, Jacqueline, this is something that has really been on my mind lately. I rely on it to talk to my closest family lately...we don't call, and sometimes haven't visited because we already shared something on facebook. It has been disturbing me because I thought for awhile this was drawing us closer, but I get stupidly jealous when I see them "being friends" with other people and isn't that sooo stupid? "Why did they comment on so and so and not me?" In real life, they'd be calling so and so, and I'd never know it, and there is never a reason to be jealous. In real life, I should be calling people I love not because it is easier to do so, but because I love them and miss them. I've thought about it probably since the day I started it...often I'll think, If I did stop facebook it'll be harder to talk to this or that family member. Then I have to stop and realize, if I really love that person and want to talk to them, it is never work, what the heck am I thinking?! You've prompted me to do something that shouldn't be so it addictive? Will there be withdrawal? Will I get headaches and shake and have insomnia?

  2. I totally agree with you, J - but I have not seen the film. I have only ever set up a Facebook account under a false name (this one) and I tried to de-register about 3 years ago, but - of course - this is impossible. It's like the 'Hotel California'. Thank God they don't know what I am really called. I really believe that the young lot do not know what they are doing by sending all that stuff out into the world.

  3. Not sure how I feel...yet!
    ... although I do have a place on facebook, I don't usually post anything, so I will watch the movie, hopefully tonight, and get back with my feelings on this. I do agree with what you and Tom have said.

  4. Just in case you want to delete profiles in an easy way, there's always this:

  5. I am one of the two people who have not heard of this movie. Honestly. I do not own a T.V. or radio nor do I particiapte in Facebook or read the daily paper (all by choice) - I had it up to my ears in this kind of negativity over 8 years ago. When I want the news or weather, I read it from the net. We do have choices and we can live our lives in a more positive way!

  6. I have said to my children that people expose so much of themselves now, that I feel in the future it is goign to be "on Trend" to be private.

    I don't find facebook, and don't even respond when people I hardly know ask to be a "friend". I've had it out a couple of times about photos my kids and/or their friends post. The problem with the photos is they are out of context for anyone but whose was there, os up to the interpretation of whomever is lookg at them.

  7. Katiebird...I think you will be just fine. You will make the Zuzu so appropriately says, we have choices.
    Thanks Krista...I'll check the website out. Right now, I am okay with the account being inactive.
    Tom, I wish I could impress upon my kids how Universally negative I believe this to be.
    V. Let me know what you think about the movie. And we do have to remember here, this is a MOVIE...however, since it's release, I haven't heard of any defamation of character lawsuits!

  8. I deactivated my account on facebook a while ago

    I have NEVer trusted someone who talks the talk............I always wanyt to look for a QUIET WALK THE WALKER!

  9. Hi sweetie, I have not seen the movie, BUT..several months ago I listened to an ABC radio talk about Facebook, I was horrified,I had facebook while a friend was on holiday in the Uk and she posted her pics for us to follow her, as soon as she was home I closed my Facebook daughter in law cannot live without it, she is hooked by her own words,if 200 people are your friends now,how special were they! these are people you would not normally call so in normal life they did not count.I think you have done the right thing,actually that is how I came to read blogs someone told me about blogland,a much nicer place!Carole

  10. This is a difficult one. I haven't seen the movie and have no real desire to, despite using facebook! All social networking, and blogging is one of these have their pros and cons. All methods of communicating have people who will use it wisely and people who won't. Good things can come from it, as can bad. It depends on maturity, and unfortunately that's where these tools fail, spectacularly sometimes. I'll keep mine going until it no longer serves a reasonable purpose. But I do love Razmataz's comment about private becoming 'on trend' :)

  11. I have a FB account but never post a status and rarely look at it. The reason I keep it is that I have a few friends and family who personally message me on it. I really do not like it at all and am not far at all from cancelling my account. Joe has been unfathered by two of his older girls and that is very hurtful. The two of us have been attacked personally so we definitely are not fans. I find it very much a bully pulpit in many ways. I just did not think the movie was worth my time.

  12. I know I keep rabbiting on about this, but I think seeing the movie (providing it proves to be a representation of the truth) explains the climate within which Facebook was conceived and born. I had no idea (shame on me) before last night.
    I don't think Facebook in an of itself is a bad Kelly so wisely puts it, it's all about how it is used. I do find their security settings convoluted (would have never understood how to seemingly protect my privacy without considerable help and heads-up from my daughter) and designed to make the best use of an individual's information for the good of the company and their clients and not the subscribers.

    All of that makes more sense to me now that I understand Facebook's principals and their principles or lack of same.

    I guess it all boils down to caveat emptor. I've made my decision and I'm okay with it...for now.

  13. Agreed, Jacqueline - I haven't seen the movie, but Facebook is such a mass of trivia, and I'd rather have a couple of real friends than a deluge of information about everyone's life.

  14. I haven't seen the movie yet, but as the tagline say, you don't make all those friends without making some enemies along the way.

    If the movie made you feel strongly enough to close down your FB account, then that's what you need to do. In fact, you're probably better off not being on FB anymore - there are better ways to keep in touch with people, like actually talking to them! :-)

  15. This is a really interesting post J. The only reason I use Facebook is to keep in touch with the immediate family as an easy way to share photos. I've not seen the movie either. Saying that - I hate mean spiritedness wherever it comes from. A bit back I accidentally clicked on a teenage blog and was shock horrified by the comments even to the point of siteing this person to commit suicide. It was dreadful!

  16. You've given me chills...I guess I always think the best of people and hope that they will of me too...scarey!!

  17. Ah Mise...quality vs quantity...I like that!
    It's the need for drama Molly points out, behind the security of internet annonimity, people can and do behave very badly. They say things they wouldn't have the courage to say to someone's face. Not a good thing to encourage.
    What frightens me Donna is, (once again if the movie is to be believed), that Zukerberg is a very, very intelligent individual with, what appears to me anyway, sociopathic tendencies. It makes me wonder what his next great facebook 'idea' might be. I think we can rest assured it will be about himself and not the good of mankind.

  18. A friend of mine says, "All they owe us is their art." Not that facebook is art, but the joy and beauty that we enjoy, made possible by the hands of the less savory characters of the planet, is not insignificant. I'm a big Dylan Thomas fan, yet he drank away what little income he had while his wife was at home boiling leather shoestrings for soup for the kids. Gaugin left his wife and six children to pursue his fantasy artist's life in Tahiti. I LOVE facebook. Being a very social person without a limited amount of free time and energy, facebook has enabled me to participate in many provocative as well as delightful conversations. Facebook has the potential to be as good as you make it to be. Zukerberg just engineered the machine.

  19. I agree with your point of view too T! It's what my kids and friends keep telling me..that's why this is such a conundrum. I do believe in change...and changing one's mind. I've taken a course of action...for now.

  20. I've always walked very cautiously and trepidatiously with you probably could tell J, I'm not on much. I love the idea of what it could be but that's a dreamworld idea, reality is that it's become a monster in many have other sources of media but they , such as TV, don't put all your personal stuff out there for the world to see!
    You have to do what your heart tells you...
    xo J~

    Loved Raz's comment too!

  21. I find FB to be a source of a lot of meaningless drivel - people typing totally inane things, thinking that they're 'communicating'. One of my daughters set me up on FB so I could share photos (I'm the family photographer). But it's too difficult to maintain privacy on FB so I've deactivated my account - haven't found a way yet to actually delete it. permanently.

    Good step you took - I agree.


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