Beauty in the Ordinary

This is not about being brilliant, or extraordinary, it's not about wanting to be famous, or making headlines, or trying to impress...this about sharing a 'gift' each day with the world...to lift the spirit of people when they read this blog, to show them the beauty in the ordinary.
"And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it." Raold Dahl

Sunday, December 4, 2011

News...

FIL:  "Rudy...would you come with me next week to look at some Old Age Homes?"

US:  "Really Dad?"

FIL:  "Yes, I think it's time.  Since Mom died, it's too lonely here, and all this business of cleaning and cooking...well it's just too much."

US:  "But Dad...you know, we could organize someone to come in and take care of the housework and laundry.  You know how much you love your garden."

FIL:  " Yes, I know...but it's all too lonely."

And I thought today was going to be about cookies.

It really is going to be a different sort of Christmas.

13 comments:

  1. I think we should go back to the Walton days, when several generations all lived in one big home. They still do that here.

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  2. It is so hard for them, that's why Mum came to us,sometimes it is hard,sometimes wonderful but always the right thing we did,it is not always possible,but having seen others make this decision they love their new "home' at the end of the day he will choose...

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  3. This is tough no matter what the choice, but love will guide you through.
    xx
    z

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  4. Some of the Senior residences are really nice with lots going on and hopefully that will ease his loneliness. Home is only home to him with his wife in it, Maybe the change will rejuvinate him. At least if he makes a change now, it will be his decision. It's even worse when a loved one has to be forced out of their home because they can no longer manage. My mum sadly had to go into a nursing home. A couple of my friends mothers are in retirement homes and love it. Getting old sucks.

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  5. Cro...I've gone around this in my head so many times. I have this lovely romantic notion of us all living together, but I know the reality of it too and I wouldn't last a week! Sad, but true.

    What is encouraging is that it has all been initiated by FIL. And he is picking out the places to go and see. He's a very social man, so I know he will be quick to settle in and meet people. You are right though Chania, he's trying to fill an unfillable void. Oh well, we will see what happens.

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  6. My heart goes out to him and to you J and Rudy too. Such a hard decision for you to make. I agree with everything that Chania's said.

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  7. My dad said he didn't want to take up the offer of an annexe built for him - until he realised that his daughter really wanted to. As it turned out, he didn't need it. "Goodnight, Jim-Boy!" "Goodnight Pa"... etc.

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  8. Would that it could be like that Tom...and, if the truth be told, if it were my mother neither I nor Rudy would have thought twice about having her come live with us. This dynamic just wouldn't work...I'd shoot myself.

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  9. Good for you FIL for initiating this very difficult move. He sounds like a man with a lifetime of wisdom under his belt.

    Blessings to you!

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  10. I guess the key here is to find the 'right' retirement home that fits the needs of Mr. Senior P., there are a lot of wonderful places that have self contained small suites but still offer a full dining room to eat in with other residents, and offer an active social calendar of events. I think location is important, somewhere close to a small shopping district where he can go for a daily walk and a coffee. I don't think growing old sucks at all, his health is generally good, he has a bit of money and he is above all an intelligent man who is open to change...I admire him. I wish him all the best on this new adventure.

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  11. Big life changes like this are always strange and take getting used to, but at least he wants to go and is initiating it all...that's a huge plus! Thank heavens there are nice choices out there now too...he'll be very happy.
    xo J~

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  12. I have just stumbled on your blog and this post. Since you mention Timmies and the NOTL Christmas parade, I assume you live in the Niagara Peninsula.

    My siblings and I realized our mother needed to be in a facility earlier this year. I cannot recommend highly enough Lookout Ridge in Fonthill. The rooms are bright and cheery, the staff is wonderful and Mom is making new friends (despite having dementia) and is happier than she has been in years.

    Wishing you all the best.

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